Apologies

I'm sorry I didn't update my blog last week. I was at a wonderful festival, feeling utterly miserable as it dawned on me that looking after a toddler on a camp-site would be no less labour intensive than it is at home. Instead of meditating, ecstatic dancing and sitting in a late-night hot tob under the stars, I was tiptoeing around sleeping campers with a muddy, dew-damp Babe and his football at dawn; developing a terrible knee injury thanks to the wet conditions and the fact that I was carrying him everywhere instead of pushing him in the buggy; struggling to find vegan food that he didn't spit out in embarrassing disgust, and by the end of day one feeling generally pissed off with the World At Large.

Other Half came to relieve me on the last day, but the Thai massage I'd booked for myself was nothing short of agony, as my exhausted body told me in no uncertain terms that I am in need of complete and utter re-conditioning. Plus it seems that these days you're expected to undress completely without so much as a blanket to conceal your privates, ahead of your massage, and thanks to the fact that the masseur in question had a faulty zip on his tent door, quite a few people wandering by got a view of said privates when leg was raised in said agonising postures that not even Other Half has had for some years now. I thought it was ok to be modest, and not to want to reveal yourself to anyone you happen to be paying to lay hands on you? Is nothing sacred any more?

I feel ancient, out of touch and in need of six months at an expensive spa. Instead, I have emailed a local Buddhist group, asking if they will waive the fee they usually charge for drop-in meditation so that I can get a weekly fix of feeling calm and as though I'm coping. (Since when did it cost to pray? Am suprised and saddened by state of world.)

In order to bring love and good energy back into my home, I am going to build a healing pyramid on the decking in the back garden. (As it happens, the decking is our back garden and I think aformetioned healing vortex may enrage Other Half and result in temporary karmic deficit but hey, needs must...) You probably think this is a joke but it is not. I will keep you posted on my progress. Am off to find tape measure and string before practising yogic poses that will apparently get energy flowing through my body - whahay! - and then breathing pranic life force into my knee joints. The mind boggles.