In anticipation of a holiday

Below are listed ten things I hoped would not happen during our [then] impending sojourn in the bosom of OH's family this month. As I am fairly superstitious I decided not to publish this post until we got back. I am now doing so, with annotations. Enjoy ;)

Note: the ten items are not listed in order of priority.
Note 2: neither, you may be interested to know, are the items on my 'to do' list. Which is why I am never properly on top of anything, despite an air of being organised that lingers about my person.

1 That OH's mother will drop her attempts at getting her grandsons to urinate on her head to bring prosperity and good fortune to the family. It is hard enough changing wriggling little ones on a broken bed without her nose-diving into their privates in order to achieve the effect outlined above. It is even more terrifying when she seizes them and throws them over her head, as she is old and not half as strong as she thinks she still is.
Repost: I gave it to her straight not long after we arrived: Babe will tell everyone at nursery that his granny is fixated on his privates and it will bring shame on the Albanian nation. All the males in the family immediately demanded that she stop.

2 That the hotel I am planning to stay in across the road will not be fully booked.
Repost: Mercifully, it was open. See previous post.

3 That Babe will not throw my valuables over the balcony like last time, having been taught to do so by mad granny.
Repost: He was instead taught to scribble on sheets, eat in bed etc - see previous posts. However I got close to throwing myself off the balcony a few times. (And not far off throwing mad granny off, either.)

4 That the water and electric shortages will not coincide like last time.
Repost: Only a couple of power outages, and I'd taken a solar powered lamp from Ikea so that I could read in bed and which I kept in the hotel. Hee hee. Water still goes off every morning, but I made sure we had bottled water in stock and that we all passed motions in the evening. Yawn.

5 That I will not lose my temper and insult the family every few hours like last time.
Repost: Only every few days this time, which is pretty good going.

6 That we will not be given any more naff souvenirs that fill our suitcase and prevent us from stocking up on olive oil, raki and honey.
R: Take a look at the window sill in my kitchen: mugs, plates, calendars, sea-shell covered booze bottles and an Egyptian (??) papyrus photo album.

7 That we will not get up close and personal with the carcasses of stray dogs and random rams if we go snorkeling in the harbour.
R: Snorkel did not leave suitcase. What was I thinking when we packed it? We are parents, now, for crying out loud.

8 We will not get ill.
R: We all got ill.

9 We will not get injured.
R: Babe was bloody lucky that he was not hurt when knocked down by motorbike on first day.

10 We will come back alive. (I had to word this in the affirmative, such is my primitive superstitious thinking.)
R: We did, God be praised.